Tim Liston

Single Parent & Step Parent Kudos!

As your child grows up, you have to lay down a foundation of loving discipline. Doing so allows them to learn early on that there are blessings for good behavior and consequences for bad. If you're a single parent: God will give you what you need. He is the expert at filling in the low places and doing more than we could imagine with what we have. However, every parent (single or not) must make the commitment that they're not going to let weariness get in the way of good parenting. Jesus fed 5,000+ people with 5 loaves and 2 fish. He can take what we are willing to give and multiply it in our parenting efforts.

If you are divorced and have joint custody of the children, then you're going to have to work extra hard to keep your child headed in the right direction. Often one parent is more lenient than the other. Like water, kids flow toward that parent when they want something they know deep down they shouldn't have or do. If you're in a situation like that, it does make parenting tough. This is where conversations with your child that include your reasons behind the rules will help - instead of just saying, "Because I said so." And if you happen to be the bad parent in a situation like that, for the sake of your child's future, please grow up and be an adult.

If you are part of a blended family, there needs to be many, many, many, many, many husband and wife meetings so that you think and act as one. What's more important than the style of discipline is the consistency between the parent and stepparent. However, there are some blended families... (please sit down because I'm about to drop some heavy truth on you)... There are some blended families that might as well be single parent homes, because one of the parents won't work with the other one for the benefit of the children. If you are a part of a blended family, and the kids in the house are mostly not your biological children, that does not give you a pass when it comes to being a support to your spouse, and a godly stepparent to those kids. Life would be so easy if we could just marry anyone and not have to help them at all. But when we marry someone, their situation becomes our situation. Our lives are blended together. THEIR responsibilities become ours as well. The TWO become ONE. And we're not in their lives to be a dead weight. God has brought us together for many reasons, and one of the primary purposes might be to show their biological kids what a godly person/stepparent is really like. Please take your role of stepparent seriously. God is.

Jesus grew up in a blended home. God was his father and Joseph was his stepdad. But Joseph was the one who taught him to be a man, so much so, that in Mark 6:3 Jesus takes on the identity of his step dad. When people saw him they said, "Isn't that the carpenter??"

If you're a part of a blended family, you can't use the excuses that "your real family got busted up..." or "She already had these kids..." or "You're sort of an outsider." If you're married, you have a family. It's your real family. Therefore, you don't get a pass where you can do less. The day you said, "I do" you were actually saying it to the children as well. And to do this right will mean MORE and MORE husband and wife conversations to work out the details... so that the stepparent can be sure they are on the same page with the biological parent... and they can work together as one.

It can work. It should work. And it will glorify God if you give your best!

I leave this thought with this statement: Jesus grew up in a blended family and he turned out all right. Kudos to His stepdad, Joseph!

Great CoMission Update #1: Amazing!

Street view in Jacmel, Haiti where New Hope is planting a Campus.

 

We are now at $2.1 million for the 1½ year giving period with commitments still coming in! Thank you, Lord!! And thank you crazy people of New Hope Church!

 

Here’s what we should be able to do with your generous giving *if the Lord wills it…

• Add square footage to our New Hope Church 288 Campus building for the kids.
• Build out square footage at our New Hope Church East Campus so that the kids can have more room and create some additional parking.
• Put the down payment on a building in Alvin and renovate it for our brand new New Hope Church Alvin Campus! (Launch Date: TBD.)
• Start our first international campus: New Hope Church Haiti Campus.

 

BTW – Caleb from Haiti texted to tell us they were holding their first worship service TODAY! (I’ll post pictures when/if I get some.)

* “Now listen, you who say, ‘Today or tomorrow we will go to this or that city, spend a year there, carry on business and make money.’ Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes.  Instead, you ought to say, ‘If it is the Lord’s will, we will live and do this or that.’” -James 4:13-15 (NIV)

 

Trick or Treat?

I’ve been asked the following question many times throughout the years: Can Christians trick or treat, according to the Bible?

 

First of all, the Bible says nothing about trick or treating, since it was written well before this activity began. However, we know from reading the Bible that a Christian is not to do anything that glorifies evil. So, if a particular Halloween costume (or party) is centered on or around demons, devils, evil spirits, or the Dallas Cowboys, then the answer is easy: Don’t have anything to do with it. But... If the costume is not evil (or for our adults: too revealing) and the source of the candy is known, then I can’t find anything in the Bible that would forbid trick or treating.

 

What’s funny is I’ve seen churches preach against Halloween and trick or treating, and then offer an alternative event at the church… where kids dress up and get candy. Uhhh....... What’s the difference? How come if I take my kids to my neighbors or to their grandparents and they get candy it’s evil – but if I take them to a church and they get candy, it’s okay?

 

Take a look at the Christmas tree. It was originally an ancient fertility symbol. Yet, it has become a representation of Christmas and the place where we put the gifts when we celebrate the birth of Christ. Are Christians worshipping a pagan fertility god if they have a Christmas tree in their home? Not at all. That’s because the Christmas tree has now been totally separated from its pagan roots and has become a cultural symbol of the season of Christmas.

 

In 1 Corinthians 10:23-33, Paul talks about meat sacrificed to idols. There was meat left over after sacrifices were made to these pagan gods. This meat was often sold in the market. Apparently, Christians were going to the market, buying, and then eating this meat in spite of its questionable origins. And so the issue arose, "Should a Christian eat such meat?" (We can ask, “Should a Christian eat candy given to them on Halloween?”) Paul said in verse 25, "Eat anything that is sold in the meat market, without asking questions for conscience' sake."

 

This is interesting. He says it is okay to eat the meat bought in the market place even if it was sacrificed to idols. Meaning, meat is meat. To which I say, candy is candy. Yes, Halloween has pagan origins, but I don't think that's the intent of the kindly old neighbor who gives Smarties to your kids. It's become a cultural/social event. And my take is that because of our freedom in Christ, our kids can dress up in (non-evil) costumes, go door-to-door, eat lots of candy, and just have fun. After all, “Greater is He that is in you than he that is in the world.” -1 John 4:4

 

Ultimately, you'll have to make the decision for your own family - and I'm sure you'll make the right one.